Tag Archives: astrology relationships

The Complex art of Compatibility Charts

Today I am going to walk you through the first steps in reading a compatibility chart. Probably one of the most sought after readings in Astrology, because at the end of the day we all want the same thing- love, intimacy, friendship.

What they don’t tell you is how complicated such a reading can be. The amount of information and possibilities seen is no joke. The same aspects and sign placements can mean many different things. Nevertheless, some rules do apply and you can find out a great deal from such a chart about your relationship with the other person. Personally, I know more about Birth charts and Solar returns then this type of practice. Yet even I am not immune to its charms and practical use. Here too the Birth Chart is central if you want to figure things out, there are two main methods you can try:

 A. Look at the chart as if it’s the Birth chart of your relationship to each other. Just reading it according to the usual method.

B. Say you  are dating someone new and you want to know if this is a good relationship or not. What you need to do is study your chart and then his/her chart separately and then combine what you learn and compare it to the Compatibility Chart.

As you can guess I prefer the second method, it’s just more correct in my opinion. You don’t need to be a pro to do this- all you need is basic natal knowledge and the tools to apply it.

To help you here are some questions that can guide the process. First, find out what the relationship is like in style. For some background let’s say we have Jake and Mary and they are dating for a short period of time. They don’t know much about each other, but they both really want this to work.  Jake is an Aries with a Virgo Moon and Mary is a Capricorn with a Pisces Moon.  You look at the Chart and you see the Sun falls into Leo in 10th house and the Moon is in Virgo in the 6th. Though the rest of the chart should be considered in terms of style you already know that it’s more of a “work” relationship than a “romantic” one. This doesn’t mean they can’t fall in love and marry – not at all! It just means that the relationship is going to be more about working together and making goals and a daily routine then about fun adventures.

It is also very important to compare the signs to the Birth charts of the couple.  We know that Aries and Capricorn are worlds apart, but here we have opposite Moon’s In Virgo and Pisces. So Jake and Mary may feel that the other one has qualities that they wish they had. Jake may wish he could let go of analyzing his emotions and just feel and Mary may wish she could be less sensitive to criticism. The combined chart (as I call it) has a Moon in Virgo in the 6th house. Because Jake is a Virgo moon then a power struggle to have the relationship as he wants it to be may become a problem. You see- he may fall in love with Mary and feel amazing with her, but she may find it a bit harder to feel good. Unless they “work” on their emotions and home together or build a project that would enhance their careers. Emotionally this is not an easy partnership.

But let’s not give up and keep looking some more. Sun in Leo is somewhat fun and gives both of them time to breath- as long as they take pride in who they are by doing work. Next Venus and Mars are very important. Jake has his Venus in Taurus making him sensual and giving in love, but most importantly it makes him want women that are stable, practical, and classy- Just like Mary! Who is such a Capricorn that she does have some of these qualities: she is classy and practical, and Jake would like that about her. Jakes Mars is in Cancer which gets along amazingly with the opposite Capricorn in a sexual relationship.  So things are not as bad as a first glance would make you think. They might date and not get along at first but eventually over time they will enjoy each other.  What about Mary?  She had her Mars in Leo; she likes a partner who is confident, creative, energetic and maybe a little bossy. But most importantly she likes him to be open and have a big heart. Jake is an Aries and he is very much that- open, honest and proud. His very analytical nature would be forgiven as it helps Mary overcome her fears and deal with her dreams, turning them into reality. As a Capricorn she would like that very much. They both can have a nice business together maybe at home (Moon in the 10th house) and if they work as a team then this can be a very loving partnership.

This is just a very little example- but as you can see so many things need to be taken into account when trying to understand a relationship.


Here is a check list that would help you:

Is the chart more about feelings? Planets in the 4th, 8th and 12th house. or Is it more about ideals? the 9th house or perhaps all about fun? look for planets In the 5th house.

Is it a harmonious relationship? Lots of Trines and sextiles, or a challenging one? Many squares and opposing planets.

Is Saturn well aspected? If yes it will be a long lasting relationship.  

Uranus may show you if a breaking up is a danger.  

Is it a soul-mate relationship- planets in the 7th house,8th and sometimes 12th. 

Does any of the partners have anger issues (Mars) or substance abuse (Neptune)?

I hope this helps, please remember that even a difficult chart can with some extra work signify a great relationship. It’s all about learning the weak and strong points for a better version of the chart.

Wish you love.



Love your Venus: part 1

Note: If you have more than two planets in a sign or house then perhaps reading the Venus for that would be more accurate as well as the actual placement.

Venus is so important in your chart, I really can’t stress this enough. What is Venus in your chart?  You probably think about Venus as being the planet of love, beauty and money- and you are right. But in human development Venus is a little more than that. When you are born you are born as your Sun sign- you ego, your father and your true self. Your Moon is your home and mother, your nurturing and your emotional learning in childhood. Mercury is our skill set in later years- when you learn to speak and make connections with others that are called friendships.   All this is your base- what made you who you are very early in life. Venus is the love you are able to give and receive based on all the other experiences and connections you have had- because Venus rules your values  and they developed as a result of the nurturing from parents ,friends ,brothers sisters and the community and country at large. There are only 12 signs for your Venus to reside, so what makes your Venus your own is so much more:  The house and the aspects and the whole chart have to be taken into consideration. Nevertheless, here is a simple but true break down of Venus placements according to what makes you feel good and what can help you when you don’t feel love.

Venus in Aries:  Love needs to be open, based on honesty and without heavy restrictions. Your learned to give others affection and physical connection without limits. You are very warm and giving without thought and because of that you expect others to give the same in return. They may have called you selfish for wanting to get your own way, never realizing you are more than happy to return affection in return. Like a child you play with fire and you get burned, so you must learn that not everyone is worthy of you. You grow up and develop pride that hides behind it the hurt and burns of your past. To heal you must let go and open tis flood of passion to the world- your will suffer less being able to be yourself.

Venus in Taurus: Your love needs to be real, something that cannot be taken away from you. Empty promises force you to turn cold to others. You are fully capable of loving yourself as you are in the flesh- misgivings, shortcomings and sensual cravings. You can offer the same gift to others- not unconditional love but accepting love. You learned that your touch is healing magic, that friends run to you for sweet comfort and that the simple things in life can save a heart from breaking. You give your body and only then your soul and when you don you don’t know how to take it back. If you are forced to take your broken heart from another- you will feel empty and in return would try to fill up the space with sensual comfort. But yours is a loving nature and living without expressing it isn’t worth it at all for you true values are based on love.

Venus in Gemini: Your love is learned through mirroring others, if they were good mirrors in childhood then you would be the easy- going of them all, and if not then you will choose to go it alone.  In fact, you are easy going either way- just not happy. Your true need is that of a partner in crime, always someone to be there for you. That someone can be of any age, race or gender but they must treat you with acceptance.  Through them you will learn your gifts of fun and self-expression, until you are older. When you are older this need would turn into a passion and secret quest: to find your soulmate. At heart you are a romantic, and your soulmate is always right around the corner. To be happy you should not make promises you can’t keep. Don’t love those who ask that of you for that would be your defeat. Instead, live day by day, inventing your soulmate in your dreams and finding pieces of this ideal friend in your reality.

Venus in Cancer: Your love is endless; you have the true ability to lose yourself in the emotion of love. You only knew this type of love towards either in childhood or before you were born and either way it’s not a very secure knowing. Therefore, you feel secure in your emotions only when you give them to others- you can trust yourself but not others. Learning to receive caring and nurture from others is your early task. You may shy away from it in many ways, in private you wonder why love like yours cannot be found.  It can be of course. but only if you learn that you are strong. Stronger than others for you love is endless and can survive anything. In early adulthood you masked your emotions in order to get by perhaps by staying a child and not growing up, perhaps by growing up too fast. Your fear is all that is stopping you and once you let go- your ability to give and receive love is beyond compare.

Venus in Leo: Love is for those who are worth it, is what you have learned. One must win love before they have any entitlement for it. And so you made sure as a child that you are worth it, that you are the best- and only then were you allowed to enjoy others affection. For you love is always conditional and dangerous. Being loved unconditionally by someone who doesn’t recognize your worth, is the outmost of failures- you rather have no love at all. And so you develop your own fantasy:  where someone wins your heart. They must slay the dragon and kill the witch, and of course you are the prize.  When this does not happen, you are secretly sure this is your fault- that you are not good enough. If you only open your eyes you will see how everyone in your path is more than ready to slay the dragon- they just think they are not good enough for you.  Love is drama and song for you. Your greatest gift is turning the grayest of stories into a fairytale- by making anyone feel like they are the best.

Venus in Virgo: You don’t need much, just a little of that one very particular something, right? When you were young affection wasn’t given easily. Not that you weren’t loved but circumstances may have required various rules and limits on that affection. As you grew up you developed you system of right and wrong times to express love- probably as a reaction to you upbringing and sometimes in an opposite direction. If affection was cold, you may have no boundaries at all and if you were smothered then you set strict lines in your relationships.  As a result you allow yourself to express love through service or in a situation that has its own rules of the game: working relations, marriage and yes even affairs that have their own rules, don’t they?  For you to find true love and be happy you must respect your partner and the values they hold and you must know they need you.  You may fall into the trap of analyzing until all emotion is gone- for you must know it is the right time for you to open your heart and how will you know this if not through the mind?  But nevertheless you will keep to the rules, loyally giving more and more- even if no respect or love is received.  For you to be happy you must make your number one rule that of receiving it in return.

Venus in Libra: Love is about harmony. For you it is the space where balance is reached and conclusions stay in place. You are always in two places at once, trying to decide what road to choose next. Your heart loves everyone without reserve and yet you realize early on that this state of affairs isn’t ok with other people.  They ask you to choose; maybe it was your family maybe just life. You had to make a choice you could not make and so you never did.  You grew up, and made the easy choice- love what is beautiful for beautiful is always good. Beauty was the answer for the unbalance between mind, body and heart. Your hate of conflict meant you would seek where you belong- that group that would not require you to make difficult choices and that would be easily affectionate towards you.  As you grow up, this isn’t going to be enough. You will seek partners that challenge you, forcing you to develop a strong sense of individual identity. When that happens, you will find a partner in the true sense of the word. Someone who is amazing, who will join you according to your beliefs and goals in life, maybe an intellectual kind of love? For the best analogy for you kind is that ancient Greek idea where from physical love you learn to know the spiritual kind.

Venus in Scorpio: Your love isn’t open for all to see, only for the privileged.  When very young you were much protected, some sad truth was concealed from you. You learned that nothing is as it seems- including love. Being the way you are you promised yourself to protect others from the frightening emotions that you have, emotions born from the disclosure of the difficult truth, that same one that was concealed from you by your caregivers. Love in your heart wasn’t something you could express and so you let it grow within, becoming deeper and deeper- more complicated as the years went by.

By the time you grew up all you knew was that it wasn’t simple for you to become involved with people.  Nevertheless you wanted to protect and fight for them, your early romantic involvement may have been with someone weaker or in need of your help. That someone may not have been able to let you have your own weak spots and so it ended. You perceived this as betrayal and closed off your brave heart. You came into your power, not much later and learned that sex is your tool for expressing the depth, the void the need. And yet you wanted something pure and true, something that is based on deep trust that needs not words. Secret affaires are just a mockery of that, but it takes time to figure out.  I you do figure it out- yours if the kind of love where one is ready to die for the other.

Finding Love and Astrology

Today’s post is going to be a little different and even a bit more personal perhaps. Love is something we all need and want and today I want to talk about that. When we think of love,we think about that person that can complete us and love us as we love them. Everyones definition of love is different but we all agree its a positive thing. I agree love is the most beautiful experience we humans can have. But  I also think love can be confused with passion,need,fear,attraction,you see the dangers here? from an astrological point of view this is even more evident. We all have deep emotional needs and just by looking at your moon placement this needs can be revealed to you. But is the person that is going to fulfill this need be the right one for you? not necessarily. You can fall in love and have a great connection with someone but that doesn’t promise a lasting and healthy relationship for you both. So when looking at your birth chart look at it as a whole not just the Moon,Venus or Mars. When a friend asked me once to tell her if she had a future with a boyfriend I realized how important it is to see the whole picture. she is a beautiful cancer sun with Libra moon and rising and her loved one a Scorpio sun. That was all the information I had about him. So I decided to rely on her chart alone and talk to her about her needs and patterns in relationships. In other words,love calls for self understanding more then compatibility with any zodiac sign. If you know who you are then you can build a relationship that lasts and makes you happy. Instead of looking for someone to complete you,be complete on your own. Love should be two people adding more to each others whole and growing better and stronger together. What about passion you ask? attractions is like a primitive compass towards a person that could be good for you. A woman with Mars in Aries would like man that acts like and Aries. It doesn’t mean she need to date one! Instead she can know what she likes and search for that in a partner. Don’t get me wrong,If you know your partners birth chart then that is useful. You should get to know and understand him or her the same way. Don’t search if you are compatible! Instead search to understand him or her in the best way you can.

Here is an overview of what each planet can tell you about love in your life:

Sun: Where you need to take center stage in a relationship,where you feel at ease at the beginning of a relationship.

Moon: The kind of connection you seek and how you react to love,anger,fear in relationships.

Mercury: How do you communicate In love and friendships? what kind of conversation you enjoy and need? Do you need marriage or friendship and a non traditional relationship?

Venus: How do you express love? do you touch,kiss,talk or stay silent with a dreamy look in your eyes?

what kind of environment or values you need to have love? (The perfect woman)

Mars: How to you handle you active life?  How you show anger and how strong your sex drive? (the perfect man)

Saturn: Your hardships and your triumphs,the long lasting partnerships.

Jupiter: Where you are lucky in love and what spiritual values you hold.

Rising sign:  How you look to potential lovers and how you express yourself when you hide who you are.

Tell me  what is love in your opinion?

Do you think astrology should be used to find love? or do you agree its only  a tool for self knowing?

Have a beautiful day


Dido: No Love Without Freedom

Dido,a unique singer with her own individual recognizable voice. Her songs speak of love,freedom and devotion, but what kind of love? I know completely nothing of her personal life but through reading the birth chart and her music Ill try to paint a picture.Dido is a Capricorn but by now you know how misleading the sun sign can be! She does not sing about the Capricorian kind of relationship where stability and honor play the highest part. No,instead she speaks of a spiritual love:

“There will be no white flag above my door
I’m in love and always will be “-White Flag

Her songs contain a devoted kind of love but also anguish and sensitivity. For most people her songs- even the sad ones, have a positive message. Why? perhaps because of the sensitivity and humility in the lyrics as well as the gentle way she presents herself.  Dido has her Mars in Pisces and Venus in Aquarius,together this combination is just what I described.

Mars in Pisces are not action takers,they are very sensitive in the way they present themselves and at times even passive. This placement in a female chart shows us that she likes man that are quite,gentle dreamers. She supports this sensitive man in their difficulty to face the “real practical world” and as a Capricorn she is more then capable of doing this. Venus in Aquarius is also the kind to choose spiritual or intellectual kind of love over the sensual. She is the one to sacrifice herself for love-if the love meets her ideal. the ideal is freedom!

“No love without freedom
No love without freedom
No love without freedom
No freedom without love”

This themes of having a partner to give her that freedom comes up again and again in many of her songs (Hunter for example). So what we have here is someone that gives all to a a partner that doesn’t necessarily answer that need for her to be herself, but being a devoted Pisces Venus she ends up staying and sacrificing her need,or ending the relationship.

Its not a person with easy kind of relationships at all. Her gifts lay in her ability to love as her true self and a partner that can appreciate the realness and open devotion is the one she needs.

Lastly,lets look at the moons placement as it shows a great deal about ones emotional world. Dido’s moon is in Aries,a very fiery dramatic placement that is great for actresses and authors. This moon is also very idealistic! they fight for a spiritual cause. Its also a good balance to the passive Mars and always there to carry on after a broken heart-and keep on believing in love and freedom.