Venus in the 7th house: Messengers of Love

Key: People who come with a social message of the divine in us all, love, beauty and goodness prevailing no matter what.

Types: Peaceful Hippie, (dangerous) cult leader, romantic filmmaker, the marriage counselor.

Challenges: developing confidence and independent identity.

Gifts: humor, charm, artistic skill, political activism through art.

Famous people with Venus in the 7th house: Charlie Chaplin, Marlin Manson, J. K Rowling, Russel Crow.

The 7th house is very important angle in any Birth Chart; it is also called the Descendent.

What happens when your Venus is in the 7th house?  To simplify, your sense of value, confidence and well-being becomes very dependent on other people.

Venus is strongly related to our sense of confidence and self-love. It shows how we love ourselves, our self-presentation to the world through artistic means such as style. It is also related to how popular we are socially and to the things we enjoy doing for pleasure. It is a very happy planet and can give insight into those areas of standing secure on our two feet (Taurus) and our movement in the world as we connect to other people (Libra).With Venus here, relationships take center stage and the desire for love is extensive.

It can go in two directions: You can be very popular and well received by other people or you can feel unloved and even hated. Sometimes even at the same time!

As a person you know how to express affection from a young age. Your warmth, sweetness and joy were your gifts. Depending on how you were raised you will deal this gift to the world. If parents were cold and did not respond to your love nature you will become ashamed and try and hide it. As a teenager your attractiveness will make it impossible to avoid dating so it is likely you came out of hiding. You will then learn that love was only to be found in romantic relationships or sexual intimacy. This version of Libra Venus uses its charm to attract other people and to not feel ashamed or alone. They do not feel real confidence in themselves and sometimes even feel guilty to be so gifted. These men and women chase a romantic dream of love- where they will be accepted and all will be ok. The love they lacked as children will finally be given to them. All they must do? Keep being charming, beautiful and to give people what they want.

Of course, this is true for any Venus! But the Libra Venus bases so much of Its self-esteem not on worldly achievement (10th house) creativity (5th house) or nurturing abilities (4th house) instead it is very much about having another person by their side.

It doesn’t matter to them that the relationship is not perfect or even broken. They feel fulfilled at having someone who can be their mirror and show them their positive traits.

Not to sound too gloomy, I think many Venus in Libra go through a phase of needing and wanting a relationship and there is nothing wrong with that. As long as it leads them to the higher developed version of this beautiful Venus.

You see, Venus in Libra gets to know itself through the love of other people. It needs to explore relationships of all kind: From friends to enemy’s, they need to experience the full rainbow of human interaction. it is their food for growth. They choose career that involve dealing with people or human relationships. They become experts on the topic and know how to solve people’s problems in this area. Why? Because they have so many problems in relationships! So they enjoy learning how to solve such things. Work out arguments, strengthen intimacy and harmony. They also enjoy watching human interaction unfold even from the side lines. So getting caught up in gossip, drama and strange stories is not uncommon. Turning their need into a career can be a smart move for them, because they can find rational and practical tools to deal with relationships. So studying counseling, law or drama is helpful.

Many Venus in Libra enjoy esthetics, especially if those involve social topics and human psychology. Those with artistic careers deal with human-relations and social issues in music, film and drama. It all leads back to their need to understand why love isn’t there for everyone. Why can’t everyone receive love equally? Why can’t we live in a society built on partnership?

These folks genuinely care about such questions and will spend their life figuring it out.

They are very charming and attractive and can use this understanding for good and bad. Many dictators and cult leaders have Venus in the 7th house. Their charm is a power that if they feel alone and misunderstood- they use as a weapon. If they grow away from that hurt they can instead inspire others to love who they are and accept that everyone is divine and beautiful in their own right.

You see, they are stronger than they appear because they their Venus means they would always find some sense of inner light eve when times are hard. They imply need to stop searching for it on the outside and look at what they bring to the table.

Usually, for this Venus how people treat them reflects their inner state. If they repress fear or anger they will receive it right away. The world is like a mirror to the process of their growth so paying attention to that- and understanding how it works can be healing.

In seeking a partner, they must be very careful that he relationship is fair. That both partners come in from similar values. Not uncommon for this Venus to step into a very unfair relationship. If well placed marriage is a very happy and romantic affair that gives them strength to fulfill all their goals in the world. In friendships they should try and have a wider circle of friends so they don’t get too stuck with one group of people. Ultimately developing a strong individual set of values that will carry them into a more stable and happy life. For that, exploring different places, people, relationships, philosophies of love- is needed. This quote sums it up perfectly:

“There is so much good in the worst of us, and so much bad in the best of us,
it doesn’t behoove any of us to speak evil of the rest of us” said a Venus in Pisces in the 7th house Edgar Cayce.

 

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Taking Care of your Mercury

In your natal chart, the planet Mercury might be overlooked in relation to your emotional well-being, but what can be more important than being able to connect with the world? To communicate with friends, lovers and family and to express your points of view to others? We as human beings need to feel heard and understood. We need it like air. Sometimes we talk because we want to feel we matter in the eyes of people. Sometimes we listen and offer our help and advice to loved ones. When we feel no one is listening or what we are saying is ignored we start to feel like we don’t matter. We ask: “What is wrong with me? Am I invisible?” This is Mercury territory. Sometimes, we change our communication just to fit in, and slowly we start to feel like we are lying to ourselves. This is normal and there is no avoiding compromising ourselves in society on some level. The problem starts, when this effects our self-esteem and ability to respect our boundaries. When a buildup of our unexpressed thoughts starts collecting like dirty laundry in our minds we become weaker. Knowing what your true Mercury needs are, can help you not overstep your own boundaries. Here is a general frame work for Mercury in your chart. Remember, aspects to other planets modify your Mercury and can serve as guide lines for dealing with any issue. The house would show you what area in your life this drama takes place.

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Mercury in Fire signs:

You need to say whatever comes into your head. You are an immediate communicator. Holding your tongue feels like torture. You are honest in what you say and don’t see the point of diplomacy. You are very expressive, and people know that you will let them know if you love or hate something. You might feel as if people don’t realize there is more to your thoughts than you show. Your lesson is to learn that if you want to be honest in your opinion, you can give yourself time to take a step back and reflect. You might feel deeper aspects of your mind don’t get to be expressed and others don’t take you seriously. You can teach others to be fearless and less self-conscious. You will learn that not everyone is as fearless and sometimes not hurting feelings is just as important as any truth. Instead, express your clear and bright point of view through other means. You can encourage, lead and shine through your communication.

Mercury in Air signs:

You have many thoughts and ideas happening your mind, focusing on just one seems boring. You need to be stimulated by others. You need your thoughts to meet a point of focus in order to express. Silence is crippling for you and not connecting with others makes you sick. It doesn’t matter if you are understood as long as you are heard. You don’t mind playing devil’s advocate and can say things you don’t really mean. You enjoy small talk, banter and a good argument. You are a quick thinker and can be very objective about your opinions. You see forms of communication as art and in that sense truth is flexible and changing. You need to be around people who don’t try and put boundaries to your communication. It is important others know what you truly believe in and what is simply an exercise for you. Don’t be offended if people take what you say too seriously, just use humor to show them it’s not a big deal.

Mercury in Earth signs:

You like to have a strong foundation to any opinion. You don’t make up your mind without considering all options. You tend to communicate in ways that relate to the immediate world and its concerns. Whatever is happening around you is going to be on your mind. You have the ability to apply anything you study to your communication. Because you you’re your time to reflect before you speak, changing your mind can be a big effort of reconsidering an entire foundation. You think words matter and don’t take it lightly if someone offends you. You can communicate complicate things in a simple manner that anyone can understand. You prefer to listen and only say something if you are sure about the impact it will have. You are good at offering advice to people and they respect your opinion as it looks you worked hard for it. You hate being cornered or rushed by people and feel ignored and disrespected if that happens. You need people who would listen to you.

Mercury in Water signs:

You communicate only a small portion of what is on your mind. You feel thoughts are an endless process that you have no control over. You are strongly effected by opinions around you. You can be flexible in your communication and use non-verbal means. Using movement, dance or body language feels more honest. You adapt your communication to the circumstance at hand. You connect to the world and others through symbols and larger ideas. You sometimes erupt in very expressive outbursts and speeches about things you care about- that surprise people. You would rather stay silent than have a conflict. Words can wound you deeply. You can communicate what others are thinking better than they can. You are not so good at communicating what you are thinking. It changes anyway.

Venus in Capricorn Revisited

A while ago I made a post about his Venus claiming it had bad taste. I do not take the fun out of that observation but clearly this does no justice to this placement or to understanding it.

I kept thinking back to this Venus in Capricorn, to the steady energy of people with this natal Venus. The way I like to consider Venus, is its relation to values and beauty in our lives. It is very much about how we express our love and joy to the world and what we consider worthy of our attention.

If you have Venus in Capricorn it means you have a highly developed love nature. That is because love for you is something to be earned. You were probably one of these kids who had to do something to receive affection- you had to perform in some way. In other words- love was hard work, not an easy flow you could just enjoy. As a result, as a grown up you have very high standards for what you need to do before you open yourself to love. This is also true about what you expect from others- they must go through gradual stages of effort to win your heart.

The key word is gradual, persistent and stable effort.  You can’t fully give or take warm sensuality, love or even friendship without these little efforts to lead you there.

You are very good at building a long-lasting relationship, and most of your connections are long lasting. At the same time you are just as good avoiding any connections if they are deemed unworthy to you.  If you feel the other person is not going to put in any effort or comply to the gradual steps in the relationship- you simply walk away, unattached. This might seem a bit cold to the outside perspective, but really it is your way to create love in life. You know you can’t have it any other way, and truthfully why should you?

The problem is, that at times it might be too easy to fall into a pattern of avoidance, of being single or staying a polite distance from others. Especially when young, Venus in Capricorn can avoid dating or serious relationships altogether. This is ironic considering they only want that type of relationship. They do have an inner ideal of a traditional, marriage or at the very least a long lasting partnership that is conventional enough. Take Miley Cyrus as an example- on and off again with one serious boyfriend she is now engaged to. After all the wild years she really wants that traditional marriage. This is true to Venus in Capricorn in that no matter how freedom loving the rest of the chart might seem- at some point they will simply want to settle down.

For you love is not a flashy thing, it is not made of huge promises or lavish luxuries. It is made out of small efforts, commitments and most importantly growth. Every relationship you have is about gradually getting better, stronger and more refined. You need to know that love is about climbing up somewhere towards a goal. This goal can be anything you decide but you must see it is moving to a higher point over time. If a relationship is good but it stays the same for years? You will feel you have failed somehow. This is unfortunate, as you might become cold towards a perfectly great partner. It is better you speak the goal out loud and find ways to work towards it together. Usually, it can be something small but it still means a lot to you.

Other than that, you are a warm lover who likes to take care of another person. You enjoy knowing you can put in efforts (work) to take your partner to their highest point. You are fine with being asked to do about anything- you will not shy away from any challenge. Unless, this is something you consider being a down grade.

For example, if the person you love asks for something you think is ugly, unworthy or simply will make them appear “lower” in some way. One man with Venus in Capricorn I knew, would  buy his girlfriend beautiful clothes, jewelry and perfume but when she asked for a pair of ripped jeans she liked- he would not but them- for him she will be downgrading her looks and he would not be party to that. This is of course one example, and his can play out on emotional levels. If she had a Venus in Capricorn she might simply avoid showing angry emotions in the relationship- instead choosing to walk out of the room. Again, this is really about keeping things classy.

Venus in Capricorn, is very particular about social norms, behaviors and appearances. Again we can go back to how they won over the adults in their lives- who gave them love when they acted polite, respectful or even like “little adults”. Parents to Venus in Capricorn should be aware of this and give their smart child some leeway to be wild, messy and silly.

Sexually speaking, Venus in Capricorn are very sensual (earth sign) they are not aggressive and they are very careful about what they do until they are sure if you like it. A lover who lets them go wild a bit is what they need- they need to lose control once in a while and to show their affection in a free fashion.

Now the pitfalls for you are many. To start with, you can as I said before become too focused on things you want and avoid deep relationships. You can also end up with someone who will manipulate you to work for them. I have many examples of this Venus being abused and staying for years- putting in more efforts the more the relationships fails. So you should avoid both extremes, of too much or too little.

A good partner for you is someone who enjoys being nurtured, who will make all the secret gentleness come out from under your controlled self. Who will make you want to touch and hug them, feed them and take care of their needs. This is someone who is not aggressive, who is sensitive and has sweetness about them, someone who enjoys and appreciates the small daily efforts and the larger vision of the relationship. Who has a good vision into the future and who doesn’t want huge romantic gestures taken from a movie set. You also need a partner with a head on their shoulders, who can think in a rational manner, avoid becoming too emotional and not irrupt into intense emotions.

This is basically someone with qualities that are a crossover of Cancer and Aquarius. So if you meet someone is both in need of what you can give but also not too dependent on you- you found a match.

Now, a bit on the gender differences of this Venus: If you are a Woman with Venus in Capricorn you give love the way this post describes. You put in effort, you act classy, and you take time with building the relationship to fit what you want. You are elegant and you don’t erupt with intense emotions. You know how to walk away with grace- unless you have worked so hard you will never walk away no matter how bad it gets.

If you are a man with Venus in Capricorn, you want an elegant, small boned partner who is hard working but also wise beyond their years. Who will take a more traditional role in in the relationship. You may not admit to it but you do want her to be a bit “crazy” on an emotional level and you do enjoy a sensitive partner who will allow you open up. You want a family, children and a nice house. And you want the house (metaphorical house) to get bigger every year.

Some other key points for this Venus:

Love has no price. You are worthy of love just as you are. You don’t need to way for what you want. It is okay not to have to ask for what you need. If someone doesn’t enjoy what you give- they never will and no amount of sweat is going to change that.

Fashion of the Rising Signs: Leo

Today we are going to discuss the appearance and style of Leo.  Out of all the rising signs Leo is usually easy to spot.  As always I will be giving celebrity examples that fit the Leo “look”; this doesn’t mean they have their ascended in the sign of Leo.  We will discuss facial and physical features, fashion and behavior. These are based on my observations ions and guessing games. Of course each person is unique and ALL placements in your natal chart play a part in how you look!

Let’s start with some characteristic facial features:

The faces are usually wide with a chin that is square or rounded but seems to be a little short. The structure gives that impression of strength and is usually flat and not very sharp.  The forehead tends not to be high, with rounded corners. The most noticeable parts are the cat-like eyes: not big but elongated and shiny. The nose is usually small, short and very cute with a flat bridge and the tip is wider with a nice round bump. You can also notice how other than the tip the nose tends to flatness. Eye color tends to be more light then dark- usually a mix of colors such as hazel or green.

“typical” Leo faces, Sun in Cancer and Leo rising Selena Gomez and Virgo Claudia Schiffer and Jeniffer Lawrence of course. oh and Johnyy Depp is a Leo rising if I ever saw one- just look at that face shape. jhonny-depp-leo

jeniffer
True Leo

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selena
Notice the hair 🙂

They have beautiful thick eyelashes that frame those gorgeous eyes.  The mouth is usually the widest t part of the face and the teeth gorgeous. Leo faces are very appealing and are considered sexy- as they combine cuteness with something a bit feral.

The most famous characteristic is the mane of hair; it is funny but tends to be true. Leo beauties have strong, thick and shiny hair which they style in a way that makes it grab attention.  It tends to be parted to the side, have bangs or sit high up like a crown. Hair color even if dark tends to be warm and lean towards golden tones.

The Leo body is not very tall and wider rather than elongated. Leo They tends to have wide shoulders and strong muscles. This rising sign is usually athletic and that shows.  If not for their active nature, they can have a bit of baby fat and rounded edges.  The legs and arms are large, the neck not very long. I should mention that all this applies to Leo rising males as well although frankly, suite and balck sun glasses are not so intresting to show. Only know that they KNOW how to wear a suite.

Leo looks good for several reasons (other than being beautiful): They have good strong body posture and always they carry themselves with dignity.  They also appear confident not just because of the way they sit or stand but due to their hand gestures and the way they hold their head. There is something regel, calm a bit lazy but always self-contained about their body language.  They don’t wave around with their hands in nervous gestures or jump around – they let you come to them. Notice that they also don’t turn their head more than they have to.

Now to some Leo fashion: Leo doesn’t wear baggy clothes. They just don’t. The clothes have to fit and often times they are tight. They choose clothes which they consider classy- something that isn’t always the new trend but makes them feel best dressed. They like to wear fabrics with some sheen and texture to it and love adding jewelry, bags, and ties- anything for a bit more shine. Some would wear “strange” new trends if it makes them feel good but most start off with classic and end up stealing the spot light.  From all the rising signs Leo is most likely to wear gold. Yes this statement is true. They will wear black- because really what they prefer is dramatic color. Noticeable, are the shapes they choose- they don’t mind dramatic big shapes or very tight fits, they are fearless. At heart they are romantics so big frills, long glamorous dresses and geometrical designs are all a great fit. I should mention Andy Warhol was a Leo with a Leo rising- that gives you some clues.  They are cool. Leo is creative, artistic, romantic and warm and that is obvious in their fashion choices.

Now, are you ready for some super Leo clothes? You may need sun glasses for this one . freddie beyonce-leo

Freddie and Beyonce, two famous Leo risings.

I would only like to add that Leo rising tend to be warm and supportive people. They see the world as their stage and are more than willing to have you there with them. They have tremendous creative drive, passion and child-like playfulness. They respect themselves and as a result they respect you.  They have a big heart and a hot temper but they don’t judge. Leo just wants to shine and fill the world with the light of their personality. As long as Leo has that- they behave. If circumstances take away from their light and warmth they turn to anger and depression. Leo rising must not repress their drive and passion- the world is better when they share the full force of who they are.

 

Date for every sign

So…Today a quick fun holidays post about the best date for every sign, of course if you know anything about Astrology our Sun sign is a small and fraction of who we are.  That being said our Sun is our ego, our self-esteem, our confidence- all things that make us happy.

Feel free to find a date that works for the chart of the person (if you know it).  For example, the perfect date for my Leo friend would fit in Gemini as she has both Moon and Venus in that sign. I wrote this with a first or second date in mind, this is not about what a sign needs in a relationship but about the general style of how they like things to play out in terms of activity. Also, this is not an in-depth or very accurate description of a sign. Why? Because a Leo Venus is not a Leo Moon, instead look at it as personality types and how to date them. Hope I made that clear and we can proceed to how fun it is to date all these different types.

What is your favorite date and what is your sign?

Date for Aries

A good date for this strong personality ruled by Mars would involve a little action. Aries enjoy anything that is new, exciting, physical and playful. Many appreciate having an adrenaline spike. So get them an experience! They also don’t like doing things alone so you can get into the fun with them.  Anything involves wheels and fun rides will be success. They can also enjoy games (paintball anyone?) As long as you let them win.  Bottom line: if it allows them to get out there and not be bored, feel competitive but also on the receiving end of warm attention- it’s a good idea.

Date for Taurus

Taurus is easy to please. Anything that is pleasant to the senses is going to make them feel loved.  Treat them to an experience that is relaxed and doesn’t involve a lot of stressful choices. They need to feel they can enjoy all that is around them- the atmosphere, the food and the music.  Taurus would also enjoy live music, theater, an art exhibition or anything beautiful. The trick is to let them soak in what you are doing together. No words needed but touch is. Bottom line: No need for expensive over the top dates, just make sure it is comfortable and smells nice where you are going. Oh and pleas pleas keep it classy.

Date for Gemini

This one can get a bit tricky; it depends greatly on your ability to read their bored face, as long as the Gemini isn’t bored? It’s going well.  A date with no complications that seems to go smoothly is what they want.  It doesn’t matter what you do as long as the conversation is flowing. That being said, many Gemini’s enjoy playing games or solving puzzles. They also like a date that isn’t too planned out. So you should plan it but make it look as if they are in a movie and stuff is just going on. Move from one place to the next, take a little trip somewhere and change direction. Gemini would appreciate a stand up show, a game of poker or a poetry night.

Date for Cancer

Cancer needs to feel they can trust you before they open up. A date that involves getting to know your soft side is going to be best.  Romantic gestures that show that you care are appreciated.  At the same time, don’t go in too strong so an activity that allows that safe space is best. Cancer can also be nostalgic and like doing something that they enjoyed growing up.  The classic movie date is not a bad idea. They can also enjoy doing something domestic like cooking together. Many enjoy following a romantic script. So the whole looking at the stars and holding hands drill. Some might also appreciate a little drama so take them to the theater or a dance show to get their emotions out. Bottom line: Keep it sweet but with a touch of dramatic flair.

Date for Leo

Leo does like the over the top romantic gestures.  They appreciate knowing they can shine in the situation.  So avoid anything that is not going to allow them to show their best: best dress, best talent or just best mood. It is not really all that complicated.  They would prefer dates to be outside the home- somewhere public. You need to show you put effort and made it not just about you.  Like the Aries they can enjoy a little bit of action and outdoor stuff- but in a glamorous setting involving heels or ties.  Bottom line: show them off in the best spot in town, and gifts are a sign of respect.  Parties, carnivals, the opera and your friend’s house, are generally reasonable ideas. Oh and keep it full of joy, no complaining.

Date for Virgo

My goodness, this one is both super simple and hard. It is about showing you have something to offer- that they want.  It doesn’t matter so much what you do as long as you’re honest and polite. Many Virgo types can enjoy a walk, a bit of nature and conversation. Yes like the Gemini date they would need to be interested in that. At first make it a coffee, don’t make it long and don’t brag.  Go somewhere that is clean and relaxed, no chaos. Virgo can also really appreciate a good sense of humor. Bottom line: simple, clean and intelligent activities.  Coffee it is.

Date for Libra

Libra would enjoy the classic date with a twist. So start with classic: a good restaurant, a show and add an element of edginess to it.  Libra  doesn’t like to be making choices during the date- so pick something for them. At the same time they are super sharp and would appreciate high culture, so nothing vulgar, ugly or aggressive pleas. If the classic pretty part goes well you can venture into something different. Like alternative music, poetry, art or maybe UFO hunting. They are amazing like that. Bottom line: not home, not nature but yes to culture of any type.

Date for Scorpio

Scorpio wants to destroy the classic date- they want to strip you down to your true intentions. The Virgo wants an honest date- Scorpio wants a date they can figure out to be honest. See the difference? Scorpio wants their emotions to awaken. If you go for a movie or a play make it something powerful and intense. They will not appreciate you trying to figure them out but will melt complexly if you lay your heart bare. Anyway, Scorpio wants an experience of emotional intimacy. How to achieve that? I don’t know, maybe save their life? Or at least show you would.

Date for Saggiterius

Saggiterius like to feel free, a date outdoors or taking a little trip is fun for them.  Unlike the Libra their idea of nature isn’t a Japanese park but a forest with animals. They also love foreign cultures so exotic foods or getting to know a culture is exciting to them.  They don’t care how highbrow a date is- they want it real and free.  So nothing that forces you into a suite or dress pleas. They could appreciate anything that allows them to learn- lectures, classes and seminars. They also enjoy sports quite a bit and comedy. Bottom line: If it speaks a new language, quakes like a duck or sounds like Jim Carrey. Go for it.

Date for Capricorn

Capricorn likes the vintage feel. They want real high quality but without glamorous or overly romantic gestures. So they don’t want you confessing your feelings but they do want you to show respect. A romantic gesture is mistrusted but simple warm actions are valued. So if you just take your coat off for them or ask them about their day they will see it as a good sign. They really enjoy classic anything. Also keep boundaries of respect and politeness at all costs. Other than that they are very down to earth and don’t need an actual “activity” for the date. Make sure to not talk too much and follow their smart little anecdotes.

Date for Aquarius

Aquarius likes a date that doesn’t say it’s a date. Keep it friendly and easy going and let them decide if they want it to be a date.  They do like to feel free and will not tolerate actions that limit that. That means that unlike the Libra they need to be making the choices for where you go. At the same time you need to be strong enough to say what you want and offer that as an option. So…Do what you like to do but make sure to incorporate their idea of fun into it. Many Aquarius types love alternative gatherings and venues that allow diversity and free spirted behavior. They would go to most things “indie” if you offer.

Date for Pisces

Well, a date that transports them beyond the mundane world is good. Maybe a date that is a bit like fate, a movie scene or dream. At least it should feel like it matters, it is about breaking boundaries. Not like the Aquarius that wants to feel they rule they world but like boundaries between people are broken. Many start relationships after an intimate conversation or doing something kind for you. I think that date happens a long time after the actual romantic connection has happened.  What made the connection? Only they know, probably something small that made them feel bound. Anyway, Pisces like dates where you both can make small sweet and caring gestures for each other. They enjoy spending time alone with you in a dreamscape.

 

Empathy: The three Types

 “All I ever wanted was to reach out and touch another human being not just with my hands but with my heart.”
― Tahere Mafi

Are you an empath? Were you told you are too sensitive growing up? Let’s consider what does empathy even mean.

All humans have empathy- with few rare exceptions. Having no empathy at all would essentially make you a psychopath.  Some people have such a developed ability that they face special challenges in their lives.

Empathy is defined as the ability to feel what someone else is feeling. It is not your feelings but you identify and understand them enough to feel them as if they are your own.

Empathic people tend to be able to experience a wide variety of emotions. Imagine emotions like colors- for an empath these colors are vivid and a wide combination of tones and textures is available. Some might call this emotional intelligence but I think that at times empathy can in fact hinder the ability to act in an emotionally intelligent manner.

If you are an empath you by nature don’t tend to separate yourself from other people. The boundaries between” I and other” are blurry.

For an empath the ability is most present when being in the same space as another person. In fact, the closer they are standing next to you and if they touch you and look into your eyes- the stronger the experience of emphasizing will be for you.

Empathy doesn’t have to be toward an actual living person in the room or a person at all- it can be a strong experience towards an event, a story someone tells you or an animal.

Like I mentioned before empathy means understanding how someone else is feeling- putting yourself in their shoes.

In order to do so- you would have to know the feeling- to have experienced it yourself. That’s why most empathic people have intense emotional responses; they feel things on a deep level. They felt things from an early age and are familiar with the different ways: love, anger, pain, anxiety and happiness can take.

Imagine talking to a friend and telling them of a problem you have or something that happened during the day.  An empathic friend would not just listen to what you are saying- they would respond as if they understand how that event made you feel. They may say something that shows they understand or they may understand without you saying anything- what you need. If you need silence, a hug or advice they will be able to give it to you.  Chances are they will show they are affected by what you said- they may start crying or shiver as if they feel your fear or if you are happy they will smile.

Most of us try and be good friends and family members and show we care.  The difference between empaths and regular people is in their boundaries and level of detachment.

An empath has a very low level of detachment from your feelings and may even confuse them with their own emotions!  Another difference is in their ability to move away from the emotions, they can’t simply forget what you told them or how you made them feel and will need a lot of time to detach. Most empaths also have physical symptoms of this experience: they can have nightmares, shiver, and feel cold and overwhelmed.

Because being an empath is not an easy experience and it can get overwhelming- many highly empathic people think there is something wrong with them. They may see how different their experience is to other people and feel they are “weak for letting the world get to them. Nothing is further from the truth, they are not weak but simply more attuned to the world- they are a radio attuned to the human experience with no off button.

Not being able to turn off empathy makes many empathic people shy away from human interaction. They may seem distant and cold which is ironic.

Empathy also has another side effect-an ability to put on a mask or play any role. Think about it- if you know emotions so well and you expressed and experienced them on a deep level- wouldn’t it be easy for you to pretend o feel something?  This ability to become anything and anyone is an interesting aspect of empathy. It is almost like magic.

The challenge for empaths is to learn how to create boundaries that are strong enough to let them function in the world. The trick is in knowing that boundaries don’t mean they shut themselves away from helping people or from feelings- in fact boundaries allow them to be much more emphatic towards many more people, without getting tired.

Anyway…Let’s get back into what Astrology has to say about empathy.

Traditionally empathy is associated with the Moon, specifically with the Moon in a water sign.  Additionally, empathy is associated with the planet Neptune.

In my experience the way empathy plays out for each Moon sign is different. Although I am talking specifically about moon signs these types can also relate to personality types and play out in other placements in your chart. If you recognize any of it- and don’t have a water Moon, that is probably the case.

1st type is the Moon in Pisces:  This is the type of empathy where with the lowest level of boundaries. You feel you are the other person completely! The emotions are also very lacking I direction because you can’t always tell where they come from or what made you feel. It is almost as if how you feel is made out of fragments of other people and places. You tend to feel collective emotions! So you are a natural actor and performer. On the other hand you can’t describe or pin down what you feel- you just do.

2nd type is the Moon in Cancer: This is where you know you are feeling someone else’s emotions- but you can’t help but let them in. You also feel very nurturing and like you want to help the other person. The need to be of service and to give can make this empathy very exhausting. Take care of yourself first.  You also tend to feel stronger empathy towards those who are weak: children, animals and the sick.

3rd type is the Moon in Scorpio: Here there are stronger boundaries and ability to tell what your own emotions are. You have the type of empathy that goes underneath the emotion of the person to the root cause. You tend to understand the reason for the emotion and are a natural psychologist. Here the empathy is directed towards the darker impulse of humanity- you understand pain and darkness and can see beneath evil to the pain at heart.

Moon in the 8th house: The Brave Survivor

Those born with the Moon in their 8th house are in for a ride. This planet in particular by nature is subject to change, waxing and waning. The moon is in rhythm with the element of water and the sign of Cancer. If you are born with your moon in this mysterious house, your states of mind are subject to constant up and downs. This basically means that the only thing you can rely on is that nothing lasts. This statement holds true about events in your life- people, possessions and thoughts all come and go. Perhaps that is why you are so passionate about what you have- you know it is fleeting and you desperately need to cling to it before you lose it forever.

As emotions are like currents and waves, you can feel safe knowing that negative states of mind will go away on their own. You simply need to let go in order to reach inner harmony. Learning how to let go might be the hardest lesson for this moon- you are deeply tied to the past. You have a very good emotional memory and can vividly recall how you felt about something no matter how long ago.

As I mentioned before, your life in general,tends to be somewhat dramatic. It is not unusual for people with this moon placement to experience death, illness and catastrophe in childhood. Even without actual events- there is a tragic heavy weight on your shoulders. Because you are so intuitive to the needs of others, as a young person many (family usually) relied on you for healing. When something hard happened in the family or home- you were subjected to standing strong and surviving.  As a result you have many emotions which you did not process or express. You think you have to be strong, stoic- unlike other people. In a way you are right- you are stronger than others people- you can feel so much more and keep going. On the other hand, this is just your survival mode that won’t let you deal with the difficult events. You are probably quick on your feet in emergencies.

At heart, you have a great healing power to help others face who they are. People tell you their secrets and you listen. You take it all in and learn from it. This is where the intelligence you possess comes in- you learn by observing emotional currents. This is true about all water moons in general, but a moon in the 8

As I mentioned before, your life in general, tends to be somewhat dramatic. It is not unusual for people with this moon placement to experience death, illness and catastrophe in childhood. Even without actual events- there is a tragic heavy weight on your shoulders. Because you are so intuitive to the needs of others, as a young person many (family usually) relied on you for healing. When something hard happened in the family or home- you were subjected to standing strong and surviving.  As a result, you have many emotions which you did not process or express. You think you have to be strong, stoic- unlike other people. In a way you are right- you are stronger than others people- you can feel so much more and keep going. On the other hand, this is just your survival mode that won’t let you deal with the difficult events.

You are probably quick on your feet in emergencies. At heart, you have a great healing power to help others face who they are. People tell you their secrets and you listen. You take it all in and learn from it. This is where the intelligence you possess comes in- you learn by observing emotional currents. This is true about all water moons in general, but a moon in the 8th house would utilize the skills of the sign it is in. For example, a Moon in Gemini in the 8th house would be able to talk and communicate difficult emotions after talking to many people about their problems. They may be a bit of a copycat and a great actor.

Generally, people with the Moon in the 8th are very mature. On an inner level, there is something heavy and serious about them. It is like they never were just children- they always had worries and thoughts about life. They are always searching for meaning and truth within the realm of the 8th house. You see the Moon has a lot to do with what we think- what is on our mind. Here the mind creates an obsessive loop of thoughts about fear. Because the thoughts are focused on very primal needs- survival, safety, sex, food and love. The result is strong feelings that might feel like anxiety, fear, depression and anger. If you take the layer of these feelings down you will find that people here are always in search of bliss. They want to experience perfect love, perfect harmony and unity. Because you need this meaning and can’t always find it in life- there becomes a programmed way of thinking that can be very anxiety inducing, hence the “bad” reputation of people with this moon being melancholy. In truth, is not the natural state of mind but a result of not dealing with inner needs. You have a need for deep experience and meaning and if this is something you can integrate in daily life- you will be just fine.

You simply have to accept how passionate you are and that you have needs that are a little different in their intensity. The Moon rules our inner home – our security. For you this place is threatened from within. You are a survivor that is also a destroyer. Your own worst enemy. How? By thinking thoughts that only pull you down and that focus on negative things. Once you fully accept you need to feel safe and start finding outlets- the record will be broken and you can start anew. In fact, that is a good description of your life. Going deeply into various places and starting over when they don’t serve you anymore.

On a social level, you are probably what others would describe as interesting. You have an aura that promises something more just around the corner. The way you move through life leaves other people excited and interested. You can also be wonderfully dramatic and artistic in how you express yourself, charismatic even.

There a beautiful quality to your voice, movement and speech. It comes out as something very raw and animalistic or dreamy and melodious. Regardless you attract a reaction of some kind.

As it happens, all the beauty you have to offer is not seen by people. It is not a stand out in a crowd kind of charm. You are very private and share yourself with very few. You guard your emotions and people may get a different person in public. This is especially true about fire signs who may appear much more open than they really are. Although they can still charm you to death.

I think the key with this Moon is to find an inner security that stands on a strong ethic of self-love. This is a process of coming to face with emotions and with putting up strong boundaries. Once this starts to take place an element of the Moon in the 8th house starts to appear- and element of great strength and healing. Without fear you can truly share with other people, stand on a podium and heal, sing you heart out, create a masterpiece or a happy home. You will always be there for people you care about- and you will also learnt to let go and be above petty hurt. No one can hurt you with their words or actions if you don’t let them. You are a survivor.

 

Fire Moon in the 8th

You have endless energy and may seem very headstrong, inside you are much more sensitive and less extroverted. You have a lot insight into human character and what makes people feel important. You know how to put on a show and can act out any state of mind with ease. You need to feel respected and respond with irritation when you perceive a threat to your sense of self. Drama, writing, acting, the law and dancing can be great outlets.

Earth Moon in the 8th

You have a strong resistance to change but you also crave it. You seek lasting relationships and situations. Your foremost need is to feel secure on an emotional level and build trusted foundations. You are a person of depth as you respect the hidden agendas of others and know there is always a reason. You choose your surroundings with care. Nature can be soothing and film, painting, poetry and singing good outlets.

Moon in air in the 8th

You re sharp as a knife. A deep thinker and an amazing communicator, you influence people with ease and can be both very diplomatic and overwhelming in your strength. At times you can become shy and act a little cold. You don’t like to be overpowered by your emotions and prefer thinking them out. You can sometimes offend others without knowing why. You are in conflict between wanting to keep it light and wanting enlightenment. You are a seeker of truth and a detective. Good outlets are politics, public speaking, research, activism, medicine and playing an instrument.

Moon in water in the 8th house

You are a secret dreamer, you enjoy a broken type of beauty and you find your ideals don’t always match up with life. There is a mysterious quality to you that no one can pin point. At times you feel your emotions are too ugly to bear. At others you feel you found “it” and are overwhelmed with joy. You are a natural psychologist and have the emotional intelligence of a mythical creature. At times you can be self-destructive and overly protective. Good outlets are helping others, healing and all artistic endeavors.